The day started with me whining because the alarm went off at 4:45 am.  I typically don’t sleep well the night before an early morning travel day and last night was no exception.  I am working on viewing travel days with a joyful mindset.  Rather than being filled with dread (about rolling my luggage down the street to the bus station or going through airport security and trying to maneuver my carry-on items into my tiny seat and overhead space on an airplane or bus), I want to be filled with excitement about our next destination.  I am not “there” yet – however, I don’t complain out loud nearly as often as I used to…baby steps (we’ll have a party when I stop complaining in my head). 

We arrived at our Airbnb in Punta Arenas a couple of hours later than planned due to high winds across the Magellan Strait which delayed our ferry from crossing.  It is 9 pm when we self-check in (the key is above the outside light fixture) to our new home for four nights.  We open the door, and I have an immediate creeped out feeling like there is something scary waiting for me in each room and behind the shower curtain.  After checking every nook and cranny and not finding anyone or anything, I couldn’t shake the creepy feeling I had and started to wonder if the place was haunted.  I am in charge of lodging (my husband is an extremely smart man – if I don’t like where we are staying, he isn’t held responsible!).  It was rustic, we ended up describing it as an ancient fishing shack and it felt dirty.  I had a difficult time finding lodging in Punta Arenas that didn’t have a shared bathroom (lots of hostels in the area) or charged more than I wanted to pay per night.  Whoever took the pictures that were posted on Airbnb for this rental did a fabulous job.  The pictures looked like the apartment; however, you couldn’t tell the apartment was in disrepair in the photos.  I felt good about my initial reaction…I joked with Mike, telling him I failed to meet my project objectives with this place. I considered trying to find a nice hotel room (at this point I didn’t care how much it cost per night).  Instead, I decided to take this opportunity to grow and push myself out of my comfort zone.  I inspected the bedding, towels and the overall cleanliness of the space and determined it was clean.  Although it felt like the kind of place that mice and cockroaches inhabited, I didn’t see any evidence of either (I couldn’t help but look for scurrying creatures continually).  I am working on not being a scaredy cat.  I always check to ensure all doors and windows are locked.  The windows were old and thin.  Some wouldn’t lock or even close properly.  During our research regarding Punta Arenas, we learned the biggest risk is the wind and not crime, so I did my best to feel secure.  Two doors inside the apartment were locked and we could not enter the rooms.  This is not unusual as owners often have personal belongings locked in rooms.  In this case, I really wanted to know what was behind each door.  On the third night of our stay, I saw a light on behind one of the doors (that had never been on before) and it completely freaked me out.  I examined the door handle closer and realized that there was no lock for the door on our side.  We think it was an adjoining door to the people living next to us.  I spiraled for a few minutes considering the fact that the neighbors could walk into our space anytime day or night (one of my greatest fears is waking up in the middle of the night and finding someone standing next to me).  Mike coaxed me off the ledge and I was able to mostly let it go (I slept with only one eye open).  The floor next to the bathtub was squishy and I visualized one of us taking our shower and going for a ceramic ride to the earth below the house.  It was nearly impossible to get the shower water regulated, it was either scalding hot or freezing cold.  As I was adjusting the handle for the water to take my shower, the handle came flying off in my hand and the handheld shower head hose took on a life of its own and sprayed water on me from head to toe and doused the entire bathroom.  Mike heard the commotion and came to save me.  He started laughing when he saw me.  I was proud of myself, rather than losing my shit, I started laughing too at the ridiculousness of all of it (I was able to get the handle reattached or I may have lost my shit at that point). 

I am continually working on my personal growth, and repetition definitely helps me to achieve my goals.  This was the 73^rd place we have slept since we started this new chapter one year ago.  Although I have gotten better about not having expectations, I was still very disappointed in my lodging selection in Punta Arenas.  I am pleased with my personal growth regarding how I reacted to the situation.  Rather than getting cranky and pouting the rest of the night, I reminded myself that things don’t have to look or be a certain way to be acceptable, they are acceptable as is.  I reminded myself that nothing is permanent and our reservation was for four nights.  And most importantly, I reminded myself that we have everything we truly need, and we are healthy and safe.